Is it rude to ask what sexual attraction’s LIKE? I’m asexual without any sexual attraction and the idea just baffles me. Is it like… looking at someone and imagining sexing them??? IDGI
I know that can seem confusing, but i seriously thought I was broken for several years because i nevernevernever experience primary sexual attraction and I do not form romantic attraction easily either (when i do it’s w/ both girls and guys). That experience was real.
this is my first time ever w/ this other kind, so I dunno if it’ll even be a frequent thing for me or not. I hope so, bc it would be convenient for everyone.
i know people are like “hnf certain types asexuals sound like perfectly normal ppl” and it’s like well yeah fuck you all of them are normal. everyone’s “normal” but society has just such a set mold for how sexuality is supposed to work that anyone who experiences things somewhat differently is going to be so confused and scared. And it’s really helpful to have labels and know “oh my god there’s other people.” That’s important.
Anonymous asked: im confused when i see people say things like "ASEXUALS CAN BE SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO PEOPLE AND HAVE SEX AND WANT TO HAVE SEX" like?? doesnt that defeat the point of asexuality?? what is asexuality if not a lack of sexual attraction?
EDIT: Due to the formatting with this theme, periods have been added in to make the paragraph breaks more clear. In addition, dashes have been added to serve the purpose of bullet points.
Alright, time for Asexuality 202 and 212 (these are arbitrary number level assignments but they’re bigger than 101 and they flow nicely in my opinion).
So, if you know Asexuality 101 (it seems that you do), then you know that Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction. A+ you have passed Asexuality 101.
However, asexuality in all is a pretty complicated subject. So I am going to attempt to answer this question and then explain it to you, so that you get a deeper understanding of asexuality.
This is going to get really long and I apologize. Everything is under the cut.
i found the post yay
oh right but i will reblog a thing for ppl confused about what secondary sexual attraction is
ah yes, it was stupid of me to say “either asexual or gay” What I meant was what you said: not interested in…
I…still don’t think you really understand what I’m saying. If he’s not aromantic, it’s still perfectly reasonable he’d marry Winry and even have kids with her. Unless he’s sex-repulsed, which not all asexuals are, he’d probably be perfectly fine having sex even if Winry’s the only one getting anything out of it. He’s made it clear multiple times before Winry being happy means he’s happy. This is not something that would “prevent” him from being with Winry.
Also, manga Ed is absolutely the kind of person who wants kids (his reaction to babies (and how well he did with Nina) makes it very clear he freaking loves them, he lost a lot of his family at a young age and would want to make more, etc- so he’d be willing to have sex for that purpose regardless.
Now, if you think he’s asexual AND gay, that’s fine. But that’s an and, not an or. Both coexist. So does bi/panromantic ace for the record, Hi!
If you”re meaning aromantic asexual OR gay, this is two times you have messed up understanding this orientation. Please do not apply it to characters without fully understanding it. And those orientations are so different I’m just… so tired of seeing them lumped together like…how can you feel strongly the character is like this if you can’t even decide which of these two incredibly different things he is? It’s not interchangable! My orientation is not something you just tack on to “prove” it’s not about your otp and I don’t appreciate it being used as a roundabout way to say “AS LONG AS HE’S NOT INTERESTED IN GIRLS, WHATEVER IS FINE” either. An it’s beginning to look like that’s exactly what you’re doing.
I love winry (and ed) but I am so uncomfortable with the edwin ship! It feels wrong on so many levels. I mean, for one, they were more or less raised as siblings. I totally get eds admiration of her and I can accept him having a small crush on her but it just feels so wrong that they got married and had kids together. This is one of the reasons why I kind of prefer the 03 version.
(Before I started watching the anime I was 110% certain that they were blood related.)
I’m also having a hard time believing ed to not be either asexual or gay. (and this is not because of some wish for an otp to become true. There’s just something about him. And I have to admit that the original art kind of fueled that headcanon..)
You can be asexual and still enjoy a romantic relationship. I’m living proof. I mean, if a girl like Winry Rockbell came into my life and I was single at the time, I’d totes marry her and have all kinds of romantic fantasies, yet here I am, ace as fuck.
Ed very well could be ace (tho a couple scenes in canon slightly contradict that- honestly I’ve always read manga Ed as demisexual,- he only gets sexually attracted to people he forms a ridiculously deep emotional attachment to. Once he chose Winry, that was it. Literally never attracted to anyone else.) That doesn’t mean he wouldn’t want to marry Winry, nor would he be unwilling to have kids with her. He just wouldn’t really be into the sex, but that doesn’t mean he wouldn’t want to do it if it made her happy.
I think you meant to say you think of Ed as aromantic asexual, which is fine, but if you’re going to decide to headcanon characters as asexual, have the courtesy to remember we come in many different types and lots of us enjoy romance.
Also, Ed and Winry weren’t raised as siblings. They are like family, but they spent a good chunk of their childhood in seperate houses or apart for other reasons and Ed and Al were constantly going off to do their own thing, making Winry feel like she’s not “really” their sister, as she said in the manga (“Maybe if I was really their sister, they’d talk to me”.). They were never taught nor ever decided to refer to each other as siblings, Ed and Al don’t refer to Winry as their sister but as their childhood friend. And it’s pretty clear Ed developed puppy love for Winry probably before they started living together too, because they fought over who’d marry her when they were young. Ed and Al are LIKE Winry’s little brothers in that she’s close enough to them that she considers them part of her family (in the same way, to use another nerd example, Harry Potter was considered a member of the Weasley family before he even married Ginny. It didn’t mean that mairriage was incestuous), worries about them, and wants to protect them, but that doesn’t mean they ARE her brothers.
seriously people better care that im ace because for me it seems to mean i’m not very good at the physical stuff and will do it for my partner and stuff but don’t take it personally im not into it and might feel uncomf after a while
and hey it might change someday i don’t even know it’s v. confusing but i don’t think it will this is who i am right now
and i still have problems explaining it face to face to ppl so awkward so i kinda usually…don’t…and i wish i could feel comfortable and confident about it
but shitbags will just dismiss that and you know what fuck that
seriously i see posts all the frickin time about how “asexuality is one of the simplest orientations but no one understands it!!”
i actually think it’s really complicated? ?
yeah sure the basic definition of it (someone who doesn’t experience sexual attraction) is fairly simple
but then you get into romantic identities and the grey spectrum (greysexual, demisexual), the differences in attitudes towards sex and intimacy, and differing levels of libido and it gets sUPER COMPLICATED
like if someone’s ace they could be:
- asexual biromantic and repulsed by sex
- aseuxal heteroromantic and indifferent to sex
- asexual aromantic
- etc etc
and all of those can be classified as asexual.
so no, it’s not “the simplest orientation but no one can seem to understand it.” if you say that, i’m worried that you dont fully understand it yourself?? there are so many labels within the category of asexuality that aren’t inherent from the simple definition of “lack of sexual attraction”
it’s a complex umbrella term and i’m not gonna expect you to know everything right off the bat or get up in arms if you don’t get every detail of it so long as you:
- don’t assault or harass people for their asexuality (don’t call them amoebas. don’t ask them to change or assure them that they will change. don’t tell them they should have sex before picking an identity.)
- are willing to learn about the aspects of the orientation that you do not understand
- don’t make assumptions
- aCKNOWLEDGE IT AS A LEGITIMATE IDENTITY and part of the lgbtqia community
that is all for now thank u for reading my rant